Less Depressing Story
Sunday, this past, was the anniversary of my re-employment at LNT. I was free and chose to come back and I am so happy about that decision, I could stick forks in both eyes.
This July also marks my 20th anniversary in retail. Babies have grown up and I've hired them, trained them and fired them and now, they're near retirement. Meanwhile, I'm slowly decaying at this job. I have dreams that all my teeth are falling out in gobs of blood and all I can do is catch them in my hands as I look at the frantic face in the mirror.
The job wouldn't be so bad if only there were no people, no trucks, no employees with problems and no stupid bosses. Is that too much to ask? Well then I, remain damned.
Sunday, we had an ad in the paper and on the front page, was a gynormous gas bbq grill that was marked down from $299 to $199. Droves of people looking for this thing and everyone who came in actually got one. So far so good. Then church let out and god+damn+christmas...they must have left the brain in the parking lot getting lickt by cats. The box that this bbq grill came in weighed in at 167lbs. It measured approx. 4'x4'x3'. HUGE box. Why would you come buy a bbq grill in a civic? And why would you ask ME to carry it out for you and say something like "well, can we just TRY and get it in the back seat?"
"NO LADY, we can't try and get it in...I've already tried this with the last two dumb bitches that came in to buy this gigantic appliance in VW's!!!" "get the fuck outta my store and please send your husband down so I can kick him in the balls for letting you roam freely!"
See, I think I need a new career.
This July also marks my 20th anniversary in retail. Babies have grown up and I've hired them, trained them and fired them and now, they're near retirement. Meanwhile, I'm slowly decaying at this job. I have dreams that all my teeth are falling out in gobs of blood and all I can do is catch them in my hands as I look at the frantic face in the mirror.
The job wouldn't be so bad if only there were no people, no trucks, no employees with problems and no stupid bosses. Is that too much to ask? Well then I, remain damned.
Sunday, we had an ad in the paper and on the front page, was a gynormous gas bbq grill that was marked down from $299 to $199. Droves of people looking for this thing and everyone who came in actually got one. So far so good. Then church let out and god+damn+christmas...they must have left the brain in the parking lot getting lickt by cats. The box that this bbq grill came in weighed in at 167lbs. It measured approx. 4'x4'x3'. HUGE box. Why would you come buy a bbq grill in a civic? And why would you ask ME to carry it out for you and say something like "well, can we just TRY and get it in the back seat?"
"NO LADY, we can't try and get it in...I've already tried this with the last two dumb bitches that came in to buy this gigantic appliance in VW's!!!" "get the fuck outta my store and please send your husband down so I can kick him in the balls for letting you roam freely!"
See, I think I need a new career.
posted by Robbb at 7:49 PM
3 Comments:
20 yrs... fuck, I'm really sorry sir. well, with dumb "bitches" in no short supply, you at least get to use your favorite word A LOT, "bitches" that is.
When you're finally granted that license to kill....they world will be a better place.
i shall not squander it.
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